Day +32

Well, they released me to go home last night.  I got home around 5:00.  I get to recover at home with clinical visits twice a week at the City of Hope.  It's so nice to be home, I can't even tell you.  I have about 21 meds I need to manage 4 times a day, so that's taking some coordination.  But I'm grateful to be doing it myself.

It's a bright sunny day, cool and beautiful today.  I'm sitting at my cafe table in my bedroom on the second floor looking out the window at folks hanging out at the pool.  Such a better view than the view from a hospital bed.

No IV beeping, no tethers, no suiting up (my house is a safe haven).  As long as I'm inside my house, I can be free to not wear a mask or anything like that.  If I get visitors, I need to put a mask on.  If I go outside, I need to put a mask on and use gloves when dealing with public spaces.  Other than that, it's such a relief to be home.

I'm still in recovery (it's going to be a while), but at least I'm doing it at home.  I'm well on my way to getting my normal life back...

Thanks to everyone for your constant support!

Day +28

The last couple of days have been better and better.  In fact, I'm up and about all day.  I spend very little time in my room.  I walk laps around this floor (4 laps = 1/2 mile - 8 laps = 1 mile).  I try to walk a mile total each day.  I'm currently walking 1/2 mile without stopping.  I'm going to group recreational therapy, physical therapy, occupational therapy.  I sit in the lobby and do puzzles, kick back, relax.

Corless and the girls just left from a very fun visit.  We sat in the lobby and finished my puzzle, talked, played cards, hung out.  They are coming back on Sunday for another visit before I go home.  Yep, you heard me... go home.

It looks like I'm slated to go home on Tuesday.  I'm eating real food.  They've pulled me off of the IV nutrition (except at night while I'm sleeping - and they are going to pull me off that too).  I'm told it's amazing how well my numbers have come up and how well I'm doing. 

My platelets are in the normal range.  My white cells are in the normal range.  The only numbers that are taking their time coming up to normal are the red blood cells.  I'm told the reason for that is because my donor blood type was A+.  My normal blood type is B+.  So not only have I had to graft and produce normal healthy blood from the new bone marrow, my body has also had to cope with completely changing blood type.

I noticed recently that from day 6 to day 20, I didn't post anything.  That was a really dark period for me.  It was probably the worst of it.  It was a terrible valley.  But I came up out of it, and it's amazing.  One good thing is God has helped me block out most of it.  There is actually a complete period in this that I don't really remember.  I thank God for that.

Anyway, I'm doing so much better, I'm going home on Tuesday.  I'll be doing this as an outpatient, making trips back here for appointments twice a week.  It's still a very long road ahead, but it only gets better from here.  I can't wait to start feeling normal, having normal activity at home and enjoying life.

It's a whole new beginning, and again.... I thank God for that !

Day +24

I just want to thank everyone for all your support.  I have been receiving you're notes and messages, comments and emails.  I have read every one of them, and I cherish them all.  Your words of encouragement have really been instumental in my getting well.  I am so blessed, and again, I just want to thank you for all your support.

I'm feeling better every day.  I feel like I've turned a corner or crossed a threshold of some kind. 

I've been roaming the halls and getting out more.  Physical therepy has been working with me.  I'm eating real food (not much, but it's something).  And I've only really had a few small setbacks lately as I push forward. 

This towing tree of IV compinenets is widdling down to just a few pumps to keep my pic lines open.  I've asked them to take pump units off as I don't need them anymore.  It helps psychologically to see the progress on the IV tree.  The smaller it gets, the more encouraged I feel to keep pushing forward.  So it's now down to just a few lines.  It also makes it easier to drag the tree around with me when I roam around.

Anyway, I just wanted to give everyone an update on my really great progress and say Thank you for all you're support.  I really miss everyone, and I can't wait to get back to a real life again...

Day +21 After Transplant

Today was a great day.  Corless and Naomi came for a visit today and I actually feel much better than the past few days.  After they left, I found out my blood counts were good enough to get out of my room.  So I suited up in my three-piece gown mask gloves ensemble and ventured out.

I explored the hallways around my room.  Then I ventured out into the large atrium lobby. The view of the mountains is so beautiful, I sat and did part of a puzzle that was already started.   I actually spent a couple of hours out there.  I think I'll try and do that every day until I get to go home.

I felt so good today, I tried real food.  Until now, I've been on a feeding tube through the IV.  I'm still on the feeding tube,  but if I can get on to real food, it will be another step toward home. 

I've been in here for weeks already.  I just can't stand the thought of being in here even more weeks.  I have to turn things around.  I want to go home.

The sooner I can get there, the better off I'll be.  So please continue to pray for my recovery.  I know I have an army out there, and I know how incredibly blessed I really am to have you.

Day +20

It's day +20 and I'm trying to stay positive and keep pushing forward.  I've been away for awhile because the physical recovery has been so difficult.  I'm feeling a little better today so I thought I'd write a bit down.

Communication has been difficult because one of the main intirejection drugs has given me tremors in my hands so bad its almost impossible to deal with.  The drug was also giving me hallucinations and giving me some psychoses.   They took me off of it and I've been working with the psychiatrist.  I'm told it gets better the farther away from the drug you get.  I'm looking forward to that.

Tonight I went to the restroom and stopped to wash my hands.  I caught a horrifyingly glimpse of myself in the mirror and I started to cry.  My immediate response was that I looked like so much death. 

But it only took m a moment to realize that what I was looking at had no death in it.  What I was looking at was completely new life... renewed and regenerative

Hallelujah

Day +6

Well, rounding out 6 days after transplant.  The farther I get from day zero (transplant day), the more encouraged I get about the prospects of my new life.  The last few days have been really tough.  I won't go into details.  Let's just say I got through them, and im feeling much better.

Every day that I'm still here at City of Hope is another day I learn how much I'm not in this alone.  I have been meeting patients, doctors, nurses and staff that have already done it and survived. 

The resources here are amazing, and their approach is phenomenal.   I feel more than ever how incredibly blessed I've been through this journey.

I just found out today, having the story I've had going throught this, that my doctor was named one of the top doctors in the United States.

So day +6 has been a real day of reflection for me - mostly on how blessed I am and how much better I feel.  It's been so important and wonderful all the love and support I've been getting.

Love to everyone reading this.  Have a great 4th of July weekend.  Can't wait to start seeing everyone again.